Tony Snow, former White House Press Secretary

is an ass. He has a bad temper. He sits in for Bill O'Reilly and makes a habit of blowing his top at a caller. Then he tells the caller that he loves him, and keep it up, and call again.

Testing kids' urine

A South Carolina public school received a 3 year Federal grant to randomly test students for recent drug/alcohol use. If a student wants to participate in any extracurricular activities or drive a car to school, they have to subject themselves to this program.

Schools are allowed to randomly test students who either participate in school athletics programs or in competitive extracurricular school-sponsored activities, according to a U.S. Supreme Court ruling.

The Marion County school wants to detect students who have used these substances OVER THE WEEKEND, not necessarily or only while in class.

"Gee, Johnnie, why don't you want to play football this year?"

"Aw Mom, Football is sooo yesterday."

Now the stoners and alkies will be even more segregated from the mainstream school body. They'll hang out behind the football bleachers, but not to play football...

The undressed boy, the underpants, and Keith Olbermann

I was shopping for a La Crosse weather station. I wanted to get the ws-9611u model, the one that shows icons of a little boy wearing dress appropriate for the weather: swim trunks, a slicker, a winter coat, etc. You get the idea. Even though I'm 48 years old, I thought it was kind of neat. Different than my other weather stuff. My wife thought it was cute.

I was all set to buy it at amazon.com. Then I glanced down in the section where they tell you what people who have bought this weather devide have also bought:

1. an extra accompanying sensor.
2. a different la Crosse weather station.
3. the book: Captain Underpants And The Preposterous Plight Of The Purple Potty People

and...

4. the book: The Worst Person in the World: And 202 Strong Contenders by Keith Olbermann

Needless to say, I'm worried about getting this weather station now. Maybe it's not exactly weather enthusiasts who are buying it.

Man dies, Bill O'Reilly does autopsy.

James Kim's body was found today, days after going for help after being stranded in snowy Oregon with his wife and children. Bill O'Reilly spends five minutes interviewing someone from National Geographic. Bill used the interview to criticize Kim for leaving the car.

Then he says, "I'm not trying to second guess." He's just trying to teach us what to do if we ever get stranded in a car.

What an ass.

Tucker: OJ is Black equals not guilty

I watched Tucker Carlson by accident tonight. I didn't mean to. When I turn on MSNBC, Chris Matthews is usually on. But I turned it on early tonight. And I was too lazy to change the channel.

Anyway, Carlson was talking to Al Sharpton. Carlson kept going on about how OJ Simpson had been acquitted because he was Black. "It was a race thing."

Is this true, I began to think. I went over the reasons. OJ had money, and could pay for the best attorneys. The police were found to have made mistakes in collecting evidence. Then there was Mark Racist Furman.

But then again, OJ is Black. And you know how those damn Blacks are always getting away with murder...

I apologize, Michael Savage...

If I ever wrote anything that isn't true, I apologize and retract my statement. Please don't sue me, and take away my building in Florida.

I am shaking in my boots, Michael Weiner.

I used to like Glenn Beck

...and it least he doesn't put down liberals like Hannity does.

But the other night, on his CNN Headline News show, he had one of a
three part bit on porn. He made it clear, first, that he was a
conservative and was against porn. He straddled the fence in saying
that he was indeed tempted by it, though. Oh goodie. He isn't gay.

But he wasn't above using the topic, and a video of an undulating
young lady on a couch, to catch your attention and boost his ratings.
Making it a three parter was smart.

Beck interviewed the head of a porn trade group, and dug up an
unoriginal, tiresome put down. He asked the guy if he had any kids.
I immediately knew where he was going.

The porn guy said he had a young daughter.

Oh, you have a daughter, Beck said, lighting up. Better than a son.
How old is she, Beck wondered.

When told her age, he asked if Mr. Porn was going to share his trade with her.

That line is so old. And a cheap put down when you don't really have
anything better.

And he appeared to be disgusted with the guy. But he had invited him
as a guest!

Michelle Gardnet-Quinn gets ravaged by Savage ...

Michael Weiner "Savage" stated that he didn't know what this college
student, having disappeared in Burlington, VT, was doing walking the
streets at 2:00 o'clock in the morning.

Excuse me. I do believe it was a Friday night. She was in college.
She was out drinking and having a good time with her friends. There
were plenty of other students around.

Talk about blame the victim.

I suppose he felt the same way about Imette St. Guillen back in March
in New York City. Killed by a bar's bouncer.

I like Savage. I listen to him every night. But sometimes I think he
has verbal diahrea. Strangely enough, a minute later he said he didn't
regret anything he had said, without mentioning any specific words.
But I think he may have been responding to someone whispering in his
ear, telling him to cool it.

most viewed on msnbc.com

while cable channels were busy covering the Foley email-page scandal
and the shooting in a one room Amish schoolhouse, the most viewed news
story on msnbc.com was:

Baby weight not a problem for Katie Holmes

maybe the stats will adjust themselves as the day goes on...

tony snow's snowjob

Tony Snow, White House spokesperson, in talking about the Foley
page-email-scandal, stated on CNN, "...and there have been other
controversies on Capitol Hill that have been more than naughty
emails."

CNN has read some of Rep. Foley's earlier emails that they say have
been really "disgusting."

A few minutes later, Snow spoke quite differently on CNN. He did away
with the "naughty email" reference after CNN started repeating that
phrase.

In a related story, Foley has emailed a Florida TV station to state
that he is seeking treatment for alcoholism. So he has taken Patrick
Kennedy's post-car crash move and twisted it in a weird way.